I’m not a big fan of New Year’s resolutions. I think we all know by now that it’s more common for our January goals to plummet face first into a pile of ice cream and Netflix in our jammies by week three, than it is for them to actually come to realization.
From my perspective, there are 3 main reasons for this (and they’re all related):
First, we set our sights too high. We have a vision for where we want to be in life, and we have the lofty idea that we can get there quickly, all because it’s January for goodness sake! This is when new things start to happen! (in spite of the fact that we have no personal evidence to back up this belief)
Second, we assume we can get there without tremendous struggle. It’s easy to look at others who seem to have achieved all that we want for ourselves, and to think that it was just a matter of will-power and one fateful decision of “I am doing this now!” that got them there. While this is a great place to start, it’s hardly all that it will take to reach your goal or resolution.
Third, we think that once we get there, we will no longer struggle. I have coaching and therapy clients who want to be where they think I am. They see a strong, independent, confident, creative business owner and single mom who isn’t afraid to speak her mind and is using her experience with abuse to help other women. All of these things are true about me. But it’s also true that I struggle to manage finances, suffer from fatigue, migraines and food sensitivities, and regularly become angry and depleted after managing my motherly and co-parenting duties. Reaching our initial destination does not mean we have reached paradise. This healing journey is ongoing and, as I’ve said many times before, I think that’s the exciting part. It means that you will always struggle in one way or another, but it also means your potential for growth is limitless.
In light of all this, why don’t we reframe this New Year’s resolution business….
The holiday season is coming to an end. Most of us are back to our regular schedules of work, school, and parenting. So, this is as good a time as any to start something new. But what your Future Self wants to remind you of today is that there’s nothing magical about January. You can start fresh on any day, at any moment. So let’s get the ball rolling now, shall we?
Episode 20: Why I Don’t Like New Year’s Resolutions, and What to do Instead (SPECIAL HOLIDAY SERIES)
Choose how you want to listen…
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In each of these special holiday episodes, you’ll hear a Message From Your Future Self, along with a suggested art exercise to encourage further reflection.
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